peep.

I discovered something disturbing
upon bathing at my new residence for the first time
and couldn't wait to ask:

"Isn't it weird taking a shower
with a window facing the road right next to the tub?"

My new roommate's lived here all his life
so his reply was No.

The strategy to avoid some of the awkwardness
is simple:
let the hot water run for a minute in order to fog up the window
prior to stepping in.
Still, it feels a bit unnatural to lather up with people walking by
and when cars pass by
my mind plays tricks on me
by assuming that they're slowing down to watch.
Granted, they can't see much other than my lathered head
and tattooed arms
but that doesn't make me feel any less vulnerable.
I can't imagine how a female ever managed
to use this shower, unless she was very short.
And besides, the neighbors across the street
have an elevated view from their second-floor windows
thus allowing them to see lower.

My mind wanders and imagines how many amusing nights
could be spent by a couple of young perverts
living across from this house if a few attractive females lived here.
It sounds like something out of an 80s comedy
with all of those aspiring young actors who grew
to have nasty coke habits in decades to come.
Most of our neighbors are elderly, however
so this whole shower window scenario is somewhat of a waste
like clean clothes on a dirty body
like soggy cole slaw at a cheap diner that never gets eaten
like the time I spend thinking of foolish notions such as this.

While taking my nightly shower the other evening
I heard a muffled crash come from the street.
A car was backing out of a driveway
on the opposite side of the road
and had hit a snowbank in the process.
I finished showering, put clothes on, and got in my car.
As I passed the spot where the sound came from
I noticed a large dent in the side of a pick-up truck
parked on the side of the road opposite of that driveway
from which the car had backed out.
That was no snowbank he hit!

I drove on by, lighting a clove cigarette
and laughing to myself.
It's a good thing no women live here,
those potential creeps wouldn't deserve a free show
if they can't even drive.




Currently reading:
"The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter" by Carson McCullers.