unwritten until now
for years of unbridled grace:
I'm only allowed
to love her sometimes.
13 lucky years ago
I did her dirty.
Since then I've been the reason
for her lack of self-esteem.
My penance should be paid by now
but you and I know
how history works
on the minds of inner children.
In the wake she goes for winners
out of jail and into hitting.
I was never that bad
though her psyche tells her different.
She gets drunk at Mahoney's
with the queers that she's befriended
and beckons me to drive
up the road that I hate most.
Usually we sleep
at her place with "Roseanne" playing
since she can't rest without it.
The script invades my dreams
But the last time she came south
and held my hand through dinner.
She took a page from mine
and paid while I was pissing.
We fucked like we were dying
faster than we are.
In the morning
while I brushed
she walked out to catch a cab.
I used to make her breakfast:
waffles, scrambled eggs.
Now I'm just a thought
in her cubicle
with water.
She's dating someone new.
I never had a crack
at a second up at bat
for all the times I answered
when the pipes would soon be calling.
No comments:
Post a Comment